


That’s a Difficult Question

by sooby



Category: TOMORROW X TOGETHER | TXT (Korea Band)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Best Leader Choi Soobin, Canon Compliant, Choi Yeonjun Is Bad At Feelings, Fluff and Angst, Idols, Implied Sexual Content - Epilogue Only, Late Night Conversations, M/M, Oblivious Choi Soobin, Panic Attacks, Pining Choi Yeonjun
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-13
Updated: 2020-11-13
Packaged: 2021-03-10 04:54:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,563
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27538690
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sooby/pseuds/sooby
Summary: Yeonjun takes a deep breath before he talks, voice coming out strained and slightly unstable. “I have a problem.”Soobin’s mental alarm goes off, worry developing when he sees his hyung’s hands starting to shake. “Is it a problem I can help you with?”Yeonjun laughs wryly, the sound ringing out into the night air. “That’s a... difficult question.”
Relationships: Choi Soobin/Choi Yeonjun
Comments: 8
Kudos: 167





	1. That's a Difficult Question

  
Secrets I have held in my heart

Are harder to hide then I thought 

Maybe I just wanna be yours

As the leader of a kpop group there’s nothing more upsetting than seeing one of your members struggle with something, but not be able to help. It’s the kind of frustration that eats away at you, getting worse every time you see evidence of your member’s problem. For Txt’s Choi Soobin, this feeling is relatively new but positively unbearable.

Now this isn’t to say that the group members haven’t had problems before. Some struggle with self confidence, others miss their families. Every trainee Soobin’s ever met has a couple weaknesses, each of which is noticeable in its own way. 

Because of this Soobin knows well how to comfort his peers. It’s a skill he excelled at as a trainee that earned him his role as Txt’s leader. In this situation, however, the issue is more complicated. And worse of all, Soobin has no idea what to do about it.

Of the four other members of Txt, Yeonjun is the most cuddly with Soobin. Kai is the clingiest, calling himself Soob’s “gum”, but the one who seeks out the most hugs and snuggles is definitely Yeonjun. He likes to pull at Soobin’s ears, tugging at them until they turn red, much to the irritation of his stressed out leader. The higher-ups greatly appreciate this behavior and encourage it when the group is on camera, but Yeonjun likes to cuddle even more when they’re off the air. 

At Txt’s dorm you can typically find Soobin going over schedules on his phone while his hyung clings to him like a koala. The other members are accustomed to this and will usually either ignore them or attempt to join in, a happening that almost always ends in chaos and a pillow fight. Beomgyu loves to make cheeky comments and make Soobin embarrassed, but Yeonjun usually couldn’t care less. “You're just jealous because Soobinie would rather hug me than you.”

This is why Soobin is especially concerned when out of the blue, Yeonjun starts pretending that he doesn’t exist. It happens one night when they’re watching a movie, all five boys celebrating at the news of their upcoming comeback, the Dream Chapter Magic. It’s a cheesy rom-com that Kai picked out, and Beomgyu and Taehyun are spending their time picking apart every dorky detail. Soobin and Kai, romantic movie lovers, are trying not to get over emotional at the cute story.

Soobin doesn’t notice until the movie is half over that Yeonjun isn’t really paying attention to it, or the shenanigans of Taehyun and Beomgyu. He’s staring... directly at Soobin. Barely blinking, nodding along to the background music with a sort of wistful expression on his face. He’s listening to the movie, that much is clear, but why isn’t he looking at the screen?

Soobin waves a hand in front of his eyes, singsonging a “~Yeonjunie” to snap his hyung out of whatever trance he’s in. Yeonjun startles, perfectly embodying the expression of a “deer in headlights”. Then he turns away quickly, frowning and blushing slightly. It’s the last time he looks directly at Soobin.

For the following week, Yeonjun takes every possible measure to avoid his leader. When Soobin is washing his face or brushing his teeth the others have no problem joining him to do the same, all except Yeonjun. All attempts to hang out in between practices only happen with four members, never the eldest hyung. Worst of all, Yeonjun no longer has an interest in hugs or snuggles with his Soobinie. On camera he plays it up, although somewhat less genuinely than before, but as soon as the director says “cut” he’s back to isolating himself and looking upset. Even when they're doing fanservice on camera, for vlive or behind the scenes videos, sometimes Soobin notices that Yeonjun is trembling. 

Of course the only logical explanation is that Soobin has done something wrong. Why else would Yeonjun have cut him off so abruptly? He still treats the other members the same way, although his mood in general seems to have taken a sharply negative turn. This is the part that concerns Soobin the most. He’s okay with Yeonjun disliking him, because it’s a conflict that the two of them can possibly work out together. But for his hyung to be visibly anxious and distancing himself from others is very worrisome.

He knows that Yeonjun can sense his apprehension. Part of Soobin’s responsibility is to keep track of his members’ mental health, and try to help them first before reporting to their manager. Sometimes the other members leave notes under his pillow, a less nerve-wracking way to ask for advice or support. Over the weeks that Yeonjun is being avoidant, however, Soobin’s pillow stays empty. After checking it every day for a week Soobin finds a single message scrawled on a scrap of paper: “Let me handle this on my own.”

He also knows that Yeonjun hasn’t been sleeping. He’ll get into bed and toss and turn until the others have fallen asleep, then get up and leave the room. Sometimes Soobin can hear the front door open and close, or maybe it’s the back, he can’t be sure.

The front door leads to the street, meaning Yeonjun could be sneaking out to go somewhere worrying. The back door, however, leads to a small balcony, the only really private area in Txt’s entire dorm. Is his hyung smoking? No, Soobin would be able to smell it on his clothes. Is he going to the gym? No, he’s been working out enough during the day already. Is he seeing someone?

Now that idea is plausible. It would explain why Yeonjun has been avoiding Soobin specifically, since he’d be more likely to snitch than another member. It would also explain the uncomfortability with fanservice, and the unhappy mood. Dating isn’t just breaking the rules, it’s putting the whole group at risk, and it makes fanservice extra fake - he’s lying to the fans. But the idea is definitely possible. Yeonjun has countless friends, attractive idol friends at that, and could easily be involved with any of them.

Soobin decides to find out one night, staying awake until his hyung returns from his escapades beyond the bedroom door. If Yeonjun is seeing someone special at night it should be easy to spot.

His eyes are barely open when he hears footsteps returning to the group’s shared bedroom, but he closes them and feigns sleep before Yeonjun sees. Yeonjun must have been sneaking out, there’s no other explanation that makes sense. He hears rustling and risks opening one eye. His hyung is changing into pajamas, pulling his shirt off with one hand and feeling around in the closet with his other. Soobin belatedly notices that Yeonjun is putting on a pair of _his_ pajamas. It must be because the room is dark and Yeonjun grabbed the wrong pair, so the thought is quickly dismissed. Much more present in Soobin’s mind is the feeling of his heart is hammering in his chest. Why the _heck_ is that? Is he afraid of being caught? He’s seen his hyung shirtless before, much more than that in fact, as all members could say about each other. Maybe it’s the dark, or the sleepy time of night, or even the fact that Yeonjun has been so mysterious lately. The moment feels personal, _intimate_ even, definitely something Soobin should not have seen. 

Yeonjun glances over and Soobin barely gets his eyes closed in time. His heart is racing, internal voice repeating “He saw me he saw me he saw me” as he tries to regulate his breathing and feign sleep. Worst of all, he hears his hyung freeze, pausing his movements a moment before resuming. Soobin’s brain is turning in crazed circles. A small part of him wonders what’s wrong with him being caught? It’s not like he saw anything abnormal or wrong. That’s the only problem though, Soobin thinks he’s seen something wrong. It was just his hyung taking off his shirt, but it feels like the worst invasion of privacy in the world. 

Soobin eventually gets to sleep, chalking up his crazy thoughts as a symptom of tiredness. They don’t go away though, and the following day he finds himself avoiding Yeonjun as much as Yeonjun avoids him. “Great,” he thinks, “Now we’re as bad as each other.”

He realizes that he hadn’t checked his hyung for... signs of another person, too preoccupied with his own stupid brain to look for bites or bruises. He finds himself growing angry at this. Why would a lover leave marks on Yeonjun, knowing he’s an idol? How disgusting, the girl (or boy?) must have no respect for him at all. But wait... Soobin didn’t notice any marks, although he didn’t specifically look for them. In which case, what kind of lover doesn’t make their boyfriend feel loved? What a subpar and inadequate girl (or boy??!)friend.

He runs through this internal monologue feverishly while making himself coffee, losing track of his task and spilling hot water on his hand. When he yells and yanks his hand back Yeonjun looks up from across the room, the picture of surprised worry for all of two seconds before he returns to his phone. 

The only way to quench his concerns is to stay up late again, or so the voice in Soobin’s head claims. He remembers what his hyung had written on the note, “let me handle this on my own.” If Soobin could only find out exactly what “this'' is, he could decide whether or not a manager would need to get involved. He would hate to be a snitch, but their comeback is in a couple of weeks and an isolated or upset Yeonjun would seriously affect the whole group’s teamwork.

That’s what Soobin tells himself as he settles in for the night, intentionally heading to bed early so that Yeonjun see’s him “asleep”. In his haste he forgets to bring his blanket from where he had previously left it on the living room couch. This leaves a slightly chilled Soob under a thin sheet, waiting for Yeonjun to leave for his adventure. He hears tossing and turning coming from Yeonjun’s side of the room, the hyung eventually getting up with the softest of grumbles and heading out of the bedroom. Soobin hears the water faucet run before the door opens (which one???) and closes. Was Yeonjun washing his face before he left? Who knows.

What Soobin _does_ know is that he’s exhausted and really wishes his hyung would return quickly. The group has been practicing 8 hours a day on top of recording and school. They’ve all been struggling on some level, meaning Soobin’s stress levels are doubled. Next week they’ll start filming the title track’s music video, and Soobin wants his hyung to be feeling better before that starts. How he’s going to do that if Yeonjun continues rejecting his help, Soobin doesn’t know, but he’s willing to try. 

Yeonjun comes back into the dorm after about 45 minutes, closing the door behind him and putting down a glass in the kitchen. That explains the faucet then, he was getting a glass of water. In which case, did he even ever leave the dorm? 45 minutes isn't really enough time to go far. He must be sitting on the balcony then. What could he possibly be doing out there? Is he on the phone with someone?

Soobin’s internal monologue takes control again, and he almost forgets to open one eye when Yeonjun comes into the room. If hyung hasn’t left the dorm there’s no reason to look, right? No grubby fool could be putting their hands on him. Yet Soobin wants to look... pushed by a small part of his brain he refuses to acknowledge. He sneaks one eye open, ready to scan for ~signs~, and _fuck._

Yeojun’s putting on a show. Well, that may be an exaggeration. But this time Soobin _definitely_ feels like he shouldn’t be watching. At least this time he’s not wearing Soobin’s pajamas, and the younger ignores the tiny pang of... disappointment? that the realization causes.

His cheeks are heating up and he doesn’t have the time to process why, too busy drinking in the sight of bare skin. The room is slightly brighter tonight, courtesy of the moonlight, illuminating Yeonjun’s figure as he moves. He’s breathtaking. Yeonjun looks over again but this time Soobin is slightly better prepared, closing his eyes and maintaining his slow, sleepy breathing. What he doesn’t expect is for his hyung to let out a wry laugh. It’s quiet in order to not wake anyone up, but it seals the deal for Soobin. “He knows that you saw him,” the voice in his head says. “He can probably tell you’re blushing too.” 

Soobin stays still, hoping that he’s wrong, maybe Yeonjun was reacting to something else. He doesn’t know how to explain what he was doing. It feels wrong and very, very far from a leader “keeping an eye” on his members. He belatedly realizes he’s still cold, and will have to get up himself to retrieve his blanket from the living room.

Soobin’s brain is running in circles so fast that he doesn’t hear the footsteps approaching his bed. It’s only by a total miracle that he doesn’t startle when he feels a blanket laid over his body. The blanket is Yeonjun’s, it smells like him. Warm and comforting and the absolute opposite of what this entire situation is making Soobin feel. He’s about to snuggle into it, thinking Yeonjun is gone, when his hyung moves close to his ear. “Soobinie,” he whispers, sounding tired and almost defeated, “What were you looking at?”

Soobin doesn’t know what to do. He stays perfectly still, pretending he’s been asleep this whole time. He listens intently as Yeonjun goes into the living room and retrieves the blanket, _Soobin’s blanket_ , and then gets into bed. The entire experience is way too confusing for him. Yeonjun probably hadn’t left the dorm this whole time and he’s upset with Soobin **and** he switched their blankets??? There’s absolutely no way for Soobin to rationalize what happened. His sleep that night is even more feverish than the previous.

The following day is the last practice before they begin music video filming. The little ones all have school right beforehand, so they show up to the practice room in their uniforms. Soobin can see the exhaustion in their faces, especially Beomgyu, who for once isn’t pestering anyone.

The five of them grit their teeth through a long practice, only taking a break when Kai trips over his own feet and goes flying across the room. Everyone is so _tired_ , the three younger members from school and the two older from their late-night “happenings”. Soobin vows to find out what’s wrong with Yeonjun tonight, before his hyung can lose any more sleep. If he sees Yeonjun yawn or stumble one more time he might start screaming.

When practice is finally over the boys are ferried back to their dorm, all asleep in the car except Soobin, who goes over schedules with their manager. He continues his scheduling once they arrive at the dorm, writing down practices and film times on a big whiteboard that hangs in their living room. The hours pile up like dirty laundry, high in quantity and higher in stress. By the time Soobin reaches Thursday, his hand is shaking. He knows Taehyun and Kai have a big test the following morning. He also knows that they won’t be finished filming until after 4am.

Soobin doesn’t realize that he’s started to hyperventilate until the marker drops from his hand and he’s doubling over. The rest of the group is sitting on the couch and eating, and they turn around in surprise when they hear him gasp for air. It’s not a panic attack per se, just a feeling of total overwhelm. Soobin _knows_ that the others will suffer, and there’s nothing he can do about it. Taehyun will do poorly on his test and beat himself up about it. Kai will be too distracted when filming to focus, and then be disappointed when the mv comes out. Beomgyu will probably fall asleep on set and the manager will yell at him. And Yeonjun... Yeonjun is already struggling but surely will get even worse. 

It’s embarrassing that he shows his anxiety this obviously, and it’s even more embarrassing when they crowd around him and ask him what’s wrong. However, one good thing does come from his little outburst: a pair of arms wraps around his waist, an embrace Soobin feels like he hasn’t felt in ages. There’s a voice too, whispered in his ear. “Oh Sooby, my Soobinie...” Yeonjun squeezes him tighter. “Everything’s going to be okay, just take deep breaths.”

Now Soobin is both embarrassed and flustered. He really, _really_ missed being called Soobinie. The attention still makes him squirm though, and he quickly tries to escape the members’ group huddle. Taehyun figures it out fast and pushes the others back a bit, already deflecting attention. “Hyung don’t freak out, we’ve already forgotten this happened. Right?” The others murmur in agreement, giving their leader playful slaps on the back. Kai picks up the marker and writes in large letters over the remainder of the week: “Dumb Things We’ll Figure Out When We Get To Them”.

Soobin takes a shower and calms himself down, angry at himself for worrying the others but relieved that he got the anxiousness out of his system. Yeonjun has gone back to ignoring him again, but Soobin is determined: He’s ending this tonight, “Let me handle this” be damned.

He waits in bed until Yeonjun inevitably gets up, although this time it takes more than 30 minutes of tossing and turning for the hyung to throw in the towel. He hears the faucet run, and the door open and close. Then it’s time to follow.

Soobin sees a light coming from their balcony, confirming his assumption that Yeonjun never really was leaving the dorm. He listens at the door for sounds of a phone call, but instead hears a firm “Soobinie I know you’re there.” He opens the door to find Yeonjun wrapped in a blanket, sitting on the balcony floor with a glass of water. They’re instantly bickering.

“I fucking told you I don’t want your help.”

“Hyung, you know I can’t just let you act like this without saying something...”

“Well you’re only making things worse.”

“I haven’t even talked to you in three weeks how could I be making anything-”

“Why were you watching me last night?”

Both of them freeze, cat now out of the bag. Soobin takes a deep breath, closing the door behind him and sitting down next to his hyung. 

“I was _trying_ to figure out what the heck is wrong with you, since you refuse to tell me.” 

Yeonjun looks less than convinced. “So you... spied on me while I was changing? Twice?”

Soobin’s hands fly up over his face, a shield against the onslaught of incredibly _rude_ accusations. “When you say it like that it sounds so weird! I was looking for... signs. Like hickies or something.”

Yeonjun sighs. “You think I have a secret boyfriend, don’t you Soob.” His expression drops, he looks almost ashamed. “I guess that makes sense, right? I am me after all.”

This does nothing but add to Soobin’s confusion. “Wait, so you aren’t dating anyone, but you think you’re the kind of person who... would?” 

Yeonjun takes a deep breath before he talks, voice coming out strained and slightly unstable. “I have a problem.” Soobin’s mental alarm goes off, worry developing when he sees his hyung’s hands starting to shake. “Is it a problem I can help you with?”

Yeonjun laughs wryly, the sound ringing out into the night air. “That is a... difficult question.”

The explanation doesn’t even remotely answer the question, and Soobin has just had enough. He’s tired of tearing out his hair over this.

“ _Hyung_ .” He grabs Yeonjun by the shoulders and gives him a firm shake. “Why won’t you just **tell me** what’s wrong with you!”

His hyung is unphased, pushing Soobin away firmly and fixing him with a hard stare. “Tell me why you were _watching_ me last night. You told me why you looked, so tell me why you didn’t _fucking close your eyes._ ”

Now they’re really fighting. If any of the other boys were awake they’d probably be able to hear.

“Why do you keep changing the subject?”

“Just answer my question-”

“It’s totally irrelevant and unrelated and I don’t need to explain myself-”

“You owe me an explanation as much as I owe you one-”

“ _I couldn’t look away._ ”

They both freeze, staring at each other and struggling to catch their breaths. Soobin can feel the blush rising on his cheeks, surprised more than embarrassed by his own confession. He hadn’t really realized it himself before saying the words out loud. Yeonjun, on the other hand, looks like he’s seen a ghost. He opens his mouth to respond, hesitating as if he doesn’t know how to put his meaning into words.

“That’s what happens to me.”

Yeonjun turns away, expression morphing into anger. “Every time I see you I can’t look away, every time I touch you I can’t let go, every time I-”

Now he's getting his energy back, words starting to slur as he tugs at his hair in frantic irritation. “Every time you speak I can’t get enough, every time you say my name I want to-”

Soobin finally understands what’s going on. His hyung is so, _so_ stupid. “Are you _kidding me_ ?!” He takes Yeonjun’s face in his hands and gives him another shake. “I was worried sick about you for over a month and all you wanted was _this_?!” His usual shyness is trumped by incredulous frustration. How could the problem have been this straightforward all along?

All this time, the solution was right here, as easy as... leaning in. Yeonjun sighs when their lips meet, visibly melting into his leader’s arms. When he opens his eyes they’re glassy. “Oh Soobinie...”

“Soobinie, Soobinie,” he repeats over and over, pressing the words into kiss after kiss. “Why did you do this to me?”

Soobin pulls away slightly, watching as Yeonjun burrows into his neck to avoid eye contact. “Hyung, I wanted to.”

Yeonjun sighs and comes back up for another peck, shaking his head feverishly. “You shouldn’t have let me do this.” Soobin tries to ask why, but he gets cut off with the press of soft lips. His hyung tastes like dark caramel. Yeonjun is murmuring to himself in between kisses. “I can’t stop.. Can’t stop..”

Both of them can tell this isn’t helping. Soobin pulls away, keeping his arms around his hyung. Somehow he ended up sitting in his lap, but it’s cold so he stays. “Yeonjunnie, why didn’t you just tell me? We could have talked about this ages ago.”

There it is again, Yeonjun’s wry laugh. It always precedes his hyung isolating himself, so Soobin really doesn’t like hearing it. He’s already armed with a million reassurances when Yeonjun opens his mouth.

“I can’t believe you decided to _spy on me_ to see if I was dating someone, then kiss me the second you found out what I wanted was you.” He rubs his hands over his eyes harshly, movements getting jerky as his frustration returns. “Both are equally as bad as one another.”

It’s at this moment that Soobin realizes just how differently he views this situation. He thought he was sure that Yeonjun knew the difference... but maybe not. “Hyung, they’re not even remotely the same. Even management agrees that they’re not the same.”

He takes his hyung’s visible shock as a signal to continue. “If you were seeing another idol, or a fan, a scandal could happen. It’s dangerous.” He grabs Yeonjun’s hands in his, more to prevent any more frantic face rubbing than anything else. “But if it’s between members... there’s no danger. That’s what I was told, anyways.”

Soobin can tell that Yeonjun has never heard this before. Come to think of it, the other members probably don’t know either. He leans in to kiss his hyung’s cheek, a silent apology. “Don’t get me wrong, we can’t tell anybody. But you wanting to kiss me isn’t the end of the world. I would rather you do this with me than self destruct over your feelings.”

A silence falls over them, hyung thinking and Soob studying his face. If he really forces himself to think about it, he really hasn’t seen Yeonjun the same way since this issue started. He’s been much more worried and desperate to help than he would be if personal feelings hadn’t been involved. Soobin was just too stressed out and preoccupied to realize he was falling for his friend. 

After a while Yeonjun speaks again, holding Soobin’s hand and rubbing circles into it to calm himself down. “I’m not sure. It’s scary. The manager is scary and me possibly getting all five of us in trouble is scary.” He’s clearly struggling both from worry and exhaustion, but Soobin waits patiently for him to continue. “Can I think about it for a while?” 

Soobin can’t help but laugh. “Ah hyung, you act like you're signing a contract. All I’m asking is that you talk to me instead of bottling things up.” He leans in and pecks his hyung on the cheek, squeaking when he’s pulled into a warm hug a second later. “Okay,” Yeonjun mumbles into Soobin’s neck. “Okay Soob.” 

They relax into one another, both starting to realize just how exhausted they are. Yeonjun squishes his entire face into Soobin’s collarbone, leaving the tiniest of kisses there to make the younger squirm.

Soobin is about to suggest they head back inside when he sees something that makes his heart drop. Their back door sports a small gap at the bottom, well known to let cold air in during the winter. Visible through the gap is a pair of socked feet. They’re being spied on.

Soobin identifies the socks as Taehyun’s, and before he can really react they’ve disappeared from sight. Yeonjun is far too busy trying to keep from nodding off to see the socks or Soobin’s reaction. He easily agrees when Soobin announces that it’s time for bed, but the slight tremor in his leader’s voice goes wholly unnoticed.

Once back inside Soobin looks around for a sneaking-about Taehyun, but finds him in bed pretending to be asleep. He’s pretty convincing too, except his blanket was frantically placed and is now falling off the top bunk. Yeonjun crawls into bed, already halfway to dreamland, and Soobin climbs up to fix Taehyun’s blanket. When he leans in to tuck it around him, Taehyun takes a breath. “I won’t tell,” he whispers, eyes closed and feigning sleep. Soobin doesn’t know how to respond, whether to believe him, whether to feel embarrassed... he settles for a pat on the head. “Goodnight Taehyunie.”

When Soobin gets into bed, a notification on his phone is waiting for him. It’s from Yeonjun, sent just thirty seconds ago. Does he not want to wake anyone up? Or does he know that Taehyun is awake? It reads “Thanks for your advice.” 

Their phones are monitored, not often but enough that all five of them tend to speak in a sort of code. Soobin understands what he means, of course. “No problem,” he responds. “You better not be sad anymore though. It’s hard to watch.”

“Don’t worry,” Yeonjun texts back a second later. “If I get sad, I’ll just come ask you for help.”


	2. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is just a cute drabble I came up with as I was ending the fic. I know many MOAs are uncomfortable with sexual content of any kind regarding TXT, so if that's you just skip this! There aren't really any plot points you'll miss out on.

Yeonjun and Soobin are able to keep their actions a total secret, returning to their normal behavior and fanservice without drawing attention to themselves. Taehyun stays true to his word and says nothing, and Yeonjun never suspects a thing. Beomgyu pulls Soobin aside one night and thanks him for restoring Yeonjun to his normal self. “I don’t know what you did but I know you did something, and I’m so glad I don’t have to worry about him anymore.” 

The two don’t get to spend much time alone, both due to their busy schedule and the fact that the only private area in their dorm is the outside balcony. They go out there a couple more times in the night, climbing into each other’s laps to kiss and complain about how hard the new choreography is. They never take things too far, always worried about waking the others or “being too hasty”, but it’s obvious that both want to kiss a little harder, touch a little stronger. One night Yeonjun bites the lobe of Soobin’s ear and tugs hard, then whispers “be mine, Soobinie” into it. Soobin nods quickly to hide his shaky gasp, and that’s the end of it. They call themselves boyfriends after that night.

Their comeback does well, with Run Away snagging a win at The Show and performing excellently on the charts. The boys power through promotions with very few mistakes, endlessly encouraged by a back-to-normal Yeonjun and a much-less-stressed Soobin. Their final performance goes smoothly as well, and the members argue over how to celebrate while getting ready to leave. They have schedules early the next day, so they can’t spend too much time out. Beomgyu suggests they go out for ice cream, and in the blink of an eye their car is headed to an ice cream shop near home. 

The idea starts with Taehyun, funny enough, looking up from his phone with a thoughtful expression. “Yeonjun hyung you look tired, maybe we shouldn’t go.” Yeonjun is, in fact, barely awake, but the statement is still a bit strange. He yawns and waves Taehyun away, straightening up and rubbing his eyes. “No I’m fine, I don’t want to make you miss it.” 

Taehyun turns back to his phone pointedly. “Are you sure hyung? We have to pass by the dorm anyways, and you’d only be  _ there by yourself _ for a little while.” He looks up again, this time at Soobin, who’s playing with Yeonjun’s hands. “Come to think of it, you look tired too, Soobin hyung. Maybe you should both stay home.”

Soobin looks up slowly as he catches on to Taehyun’s plan. He squeezes Yeonjun’s hand to catch his attention, then opens his mouth to respond. “You know what, I think me and Yeonjun  _ should _ stay at the dorm. You three can go get ice cream without us. We'll just head home and go to bed early.” Yeonjun looks at him incredulously, wondering what kind of Soob would ever refuse ice cream, but he reads Soobin’s expression and quickly figures things out. 

Kai and Beomgyu aren’t paying enough attention to notice anything amiss. “I’ll eat an extra scoop in your honor, hyung” says Beomgyu, and the conversation is dropped.

The rest of the car ride consists of Yeonjun toying with Soobin’s hand, then his ear, then his cheek, then completely giving up and burying his face in Soobin’s neck. “I’m impatient,” he murmurs, quiet enough that none of the others hear. 

“Just wait ten minutes,” Soobin replies, carding a hand through his hyung’s hair. 

Yeonjun grumbles and drags his cheek up Soobin’s neck, cat style. “I've been waiting how long?”

The manager pulls up to the dorm, and Soobin drags a feigning-sleepiness Yeonjun out of the car. Taehyun hands them their bags, holding up his phone right before the car door closes. “I’ll text you when we’re starting to head back, okay?” 

Soobin can’t help but smirk at the little one’s obvious scheming. He can’t believe Taehyun is being a wingman so blatantly.

It doesn’t matter though, not in the least. He can feel nervous energy starting to build in his stomach. This is the first time that the dorm has been completely empty and manager-less in months. He still can’t believe the opportunity unfolding before his eyes.

The two of them unlock the front door, and Yeonjun heads inside. Soobin turns to wave at the waiting car, letting the manager know it’s okay for him to drive off. He steps over the threshold and the door swings shut behind him. Only three seconds pass before he’s being pinned up against it, wet kisses being pressed to his neck.

Post shower, post  _ fun _ , the two cuddle in Soobin’s bed and read messages from Taehyun in the group chat. The other three force fed each other mint chocolate flavored ice cream, and now they’re headed home to brush their teeth with  _ real _ toothpaste. 

When they arrive home Taehyun feigns irritation, demanding to know “What ever happened to you guys going to sleep early?” Yeonjun returns to his bed with a chuckle and everything is back to normal, although Beomgyu does point out sleepily “Soobin hyung, you look like you’re glowing” as he changes into his pajamas.

It’s only after all five members have said goodnight and turned out the lights that Soobin pulls out his phone and begins to type a message to Yeonjun. He keeps his message vague, to avoid the prying eyes of the managers: “Thank you hyung. Thank you for a first.”

**Author's Note:**

> LMK if you liked this! I've written fanfic before but only on twitter, and therefore never in paragraph format. Maybe I'll post some more? Oh and by the way I listened to Wayv's After Midnight about 500 times while writing this, the two make an excellent pair.


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